I didn’t understand it until I became a mom. I thought I could hide from it, but it has found me in so many ways: when I leave for a trip, when I take an hour to myself, when I make a mistake.
You see, mom guilt can come in many forms, but for me, it came in the form of a curling iron burn.
About three months ago, I was getting ready for a dinner out with friends. I didn’t want to put Hunter in his crib, because I had just left him for some reason that afternoon, and I wanted to spend time with him before the sitter came. He had just started to get into EVERYTHING (think the energizer bunny on steroids), so I had gone around the bathroom putting the trash can on the counter, taking the cotton balls out of the drawer, and basically putting everything I could find out of reach. I only forgot one thing.
I turned around to grab a towel and he started crying…what in the world?? By the time I turned back around (literally 5 seconds) – he had reached up on the counter, grabbed my curling iron and laid it on his arm. He only needed me to look away to get a full thickness burn.
We rushed to the ER that night, followed by a visit to our pediatrician the next day, and a few weeks later, a plastic surgeon.
For months, (literally months, we are still doing it) we have put medicine on his arm, wrapped it, kept it out of the sun. We have bandaged it, he’s worn a splint, put oil on it. You name it, we’ve done it. The doctors believe it will heal in time, but it may take a LONG time.
That being said, he’s totally fine (thank God) and has no real damage to his arm or his range of motion.
However, the mom guilt is still lingering. Every time people see his little arm, they ask what happened? Or, is that a birthmark? Sometimes little kids stare. I don’t blame them, but here it comes all over again….my apologetic story….and then the guilt. I’m not sure how long it will last – hopefully it will subside by the time this darn thing heals!!!
The good news, I have heard so many tales of accidents, coffee burns, near death experiences, and hilarious #momfail stories since. It’s happened to almost everyone. I know Hunter will forgive me, but first I have to forgive myself. You see, I’ve realized kids are busy and moms aren’t perfect.
Just don’t tell Hunter that yet.:)
(Have a good story to tell? I’d love to hear it!)